Post by Eclipse System on Aug 29, 2023 17:33:42 GMT
Hello, I would like to share our personal experiences on DiD/OSDD1b.
⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️
When we were younger and had no idea what a Gateway is, we were approached by a medium who told us that we were a Gateway and would understand what that meant when we are older. Now that we are older and still didn't understand what it was but came to figure out that we are a system with individuals who have their own memories outside of the System and can claim they can leave and come back when duties on the outside they have are completed.
We are aware of people's views on this and bad outlook but as some people do use it for abusive purposes we do not and are aware that people fake having DiD/OSDD for some fucked up reason. It's not fun and a lot of us don't get along and we argue amongst each other alot and our views with each other collide in never ending battles inside and physically.
Literally one day, which I assume is because we were on drugs and alot of people disagreed we were sh***ing and have since stopped and sorry if admitting that is triggering to anyone but, literally our hand ended up moving in an instant and stabbed our leg. A while ago our hands were fighting each other and it got so bad that we had our partner tie our hands for protection. We don't have blackouts but we have grey outs here and there, sometimes various parts of our day is spotty and we cant keep an image of the body in our head and a lot of us can't even look in the mirror because of how foreign it is to us. We disagree on alot of things and it gets frustrating. It is not something to be romanticized.
We were raised Baptist and alot of us have grown up resenting religion we were abused in a church setting and all throughout our life from 5-18 when we could finally speak up for ourselves and got our voice.
We have no memories of our childhood while some of us do carry specific memories, I remember more of our teenage years but still as we age it seems like no memories stick and eventually fade away or are memory snatched. Which, Evo can literally take memories from us. We have had instances where we are talking and telling someone something and we feel that memory get taken away from us and dragged deeper down into our subconscious and it is a very weird lingering feeling and we sit there disoriented knowing we were talking about something but not remembering basis of the conversation. This happens if we are talking about our system, expressing ourselves, etc. We assume he does it only to protect us at times, when we are researching and reading out loud, people can hinder us and make it hard for us to continue reading it. Usually happens when we are coming across something someone doesn't want us to know or continue researching.
When we came across the term gateway System we finally clicked that this is what she could have meant.
Describing our old inner world.
Our innerworld was a Tower that we called the infinity tower, it was very tall and changed form adding rooms and such to accommodate people. It's more detailed than that but I'm getting tired of writing and want to make this quick.
Some parts that claim to leave and come back.
We have Malphas and we knew that he was a demon, well, knowing that we decided to read some on Demonology. Malphas is 6'7 and has long black hair, muscular and pale and he speaks with a raspy horse voice. Reading about him we found out that he can create Towers and other structures and brings with him familiars. We had a cat named Panther that we would always follow us and stay at our side, walking to a store that was 30 minutes walk he would still follow us and Malphas can turn into a crow. He is very low on emotional output and his face is always stern.
Lucifer is also a part of our System and hates the way the bible depicts him as a villain and has his own interesting feed back on it and his reason behind his actions. He hates that people see him as Satan and Satan is him and that it's not true. He also claims that he never lies and never would no matter how hard the truth is for someone to hear and dislikes people who lie.
And their are more but again I will leave that here, I get people's views and beliefs and this is in no way to persuade anyones views and beliefs but to share our own.
We are very anxious to be doing this because we know of a lot of people's negativity towards the thought of Gateway Systems but we plan to make YouTube Videos on our experiences and our beliefs and to also spread mental health awareness with everything that we deal with physically and mentally.
Anyones thoughts
Also feedback from anyone who might have similar experiences to ours? We have been trying to find a term for our experiences and finally a few months ago we came across a category for this but being new to actually knowing that it actually exists is this common for gateway Systems?
⚠️ Trigger Warning ⚠️
When we were younger and had no idea what a Gateway is, we were approached by a medium who told us that we were a Gateway and would understand what that meant when we are older. Now that we are older and still didn't understand what it was but came to figure out that we are a system with individuals who have their own memories outside of the System and can claim they can leave and come back when duties on the outside they have are completed.
We are aware of people's views on this and bad outlook but as some people do use it for abusive purposes we do not and are aware that people fake having DiD/OSDD for some fucked up reason. It's not fun and a lot of us don't get along and we argue amongst each other alot and our views with each other collide in never ending battles inside and physically.
Literally one day, which I assume is because we were on drugs and alot of people disagreed we were sh***ing and have since stopped and sorry if admitting that is triggering to anyone but, literally our hand ended up moving in an instant and stabbed our leg. A while ago our hands were fighting each other and it got so bad that we had our partner tie our hands for protection. We don't have blackouts but we have grey outs here and there, sometimes various parts of our day is spotty and we cant keep an image of the body in our head and a lot of us can't even look in the mirror because of how foreign it is to us. We disagree on alot of things and it gets frustrating. It is not something to be romanticized.
We were raised Baptist and alot of us have grown up resenting religion we were abused in a church setting and all throughout our life from 5-18 when we could finally speak up for ourselves and got our voice.
We have no memories of our childhood while some of us do carry specific memories, I remember more of our teenage years but still as we age it seems like no memories stick and eventually fade away or are memory snatched. Which, Evo can literally take memories from us. We have had instances where we are talking and telling someone something and we feel that memory get taken away from us and dragged deeper down into our subconscious and it is a very weird lingering feeling and we sit there disoriented knowing we were talking about something but not remembering basis of the conversation. This happens if we are talking about our system, expressing ourselves, etc. We assume he does it only to protect us at times, when we are researching and reading out loud, people can hinder us and make it hard for us to continue reading it. Usually happens when we are coming across something someone doesn't want us to know or continue researching.
When we came across the term gateway System we finally clicked that this is what she could have meant.
Describing our old inner world.
Our innerworld was a Tower that we called the infinity tower, it was very tall and changed form adding rooms and such to accommodate people. It's more detailed than that but I'm getting tired of writing and want to make this quick.
Some parts that claim to leave and come back.
We have Malphas and we knew that he was a demon, well, knowing that we decided to read some on Demonology. Malphas is 6'7 and has long black hair, muscular and pale and he speaks with a raspy horse voice. Reading about him we found out that he can create Towers and other structures and brings with him familiars. We had a cat named Panther that we would always follow us and stay at our side, walking to a store that was 30 minutes walk he would still follow us and Malphas can turn into a crow. He is very low on emotional output and his face is always stern.
Lucifer is also a part of our System and hates the way the bible depicts him as a villain and has his own interesting feed back on it and his reason behind his actions. He hates that people see him as Satan and Satan is him and that it's not true. He also claims that he never lies and never would no matter how hard the truth is for someone to hear and dislikes people who lie.
And their are more but again I will leave that here, I get people's views and beliefs and this is in no way to persuade anyones views and beliefs but to share our own.
We are very anxious to be doing this because we know of a lot of people's negativity towards the thought of Gateway Systems but we plan to make YouTube Videos on our experiences and our beliefs and to also spread mental health awareness with everything that we deal with physically and mentally.
Anyones thoughts
Also feedback from anyone who might have similar experiences to ours? We have been trying to find a term for our experiences and finally a few months ago we came across a category for this but being new to actually knowing that it actually exists is this common for gateway Systems?
